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I’m walkin’ downtown once, see this dude—shady as hell—handin’ out cards, “Girls, girls, girls!” I’m like, what’s this, a freakin’ carnival? “Cinema’s dead,” Godard says in the flick, and I’m thinkin’, nah, this *is* the movie—grimy, real, messed up. You wanna find one? Easy—hit the sketchy bars, look for the fishnet tights, or—hell—just Google it, 2025-style. But watch out, man, cops are sneaky—sting ops everywhere!

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So, I’m stuck in traffic on Wainui Road, and I’m losing it. I’m like, “C’mon, people! Let’s move!” But nope, just a bunch of cars and a dude on a bike who thinks he’s in the Tour de France. I’m just sitting there, fuming, thinking about how I could be at home, binge-watching Netflix instead of this.

Auckland’s biggest landfill set to stay open 7-8 years longer than expected under new proposal