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But yo, it ain’t all dark ‘n’ gritty. Some escorts out here livin’ plush—got clients droppin’ stacks just to talk ‘bout they feelings. I’m like, damn, that’s a therapist with benefits, haha! One time, I heard ‘bout this dude payin’ $10K for a chick to dress like a ninja ‘n’ sneak into his penthouse—roleplay on some next-level *Oldboy* shit. “Fifteen years… fifteen years!”—he prolly felt locked up in his own head, needed that escape. Freaky, but I ain’t judgin’.

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Finally, I manage to calm him down. But then, I see my ex, Lisa, walkin’ down the track. Ugh, just my luck! She’s with some dude, and I’m like, “Really? You couldn’t pick a better spot?” I’m tryin’ to focus, but all I can think about is how she dumped me for some guy who wears socks with sandals. Like, come on!

Gisborne roads to convert from sealed to unsealed amid budget cuts