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So, check it, I got this story. Back in ’08, Chi-Town, underground spot. This chick, she’s a legend—tiny hands, magic tho. She’d hit these pressure points, yo, like acupuncture’s sexy cousin. Little known fact: ancient China, they used it—emperors got rubbed down, kept it hush. Ain’t just a “happy endin’” gimmick, nah, it’s history, it’s art! Got me feelin’ like a king, then bam—anger hit. Why’s this so underground? Society scared of touch, man, it’s whack!

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So, I head to my first client. They live on the corner of Kauri Rd and Kauri St. I mean, come on, how many Kauris can you fit in one place? Anyway, this client is going through some heavy stuff. Like, real heavy. We’re talking family drama, job stress, the whole shebang. I’m trying to be all professional, but inside I’m like, “Why can’t people just chill?”

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