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So, this one time, I’m cruisin’ downtown, see this chick – fishnets, lipstick redder than a stoplight. She’s workin’ it, dodgin’ cops like Maya dodgin’ red tape in the flick. “You can’t handle the truth!” I yell in my head, laughin’ – ‘cause who can? She’s got guts, man, real guts. Pissed me off though – some sleazy dude hagglin’ her price down. Cheap bastard! I wanted to deck him, but nah, I’m just watchin’, sippin’ my coffee.

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First off, I’m cruising down Halswell Junction Rd, thinking about grabbing a coffee at that cute little café, The Coffee House. You know, the one with the funky art on the walls? But nah, I hit a red light. Like, come on! I’m already late for work. So, I’m sitting there, tapping my fingers on the steering wheel, and I see this dude on a bike. He’s got no helmet, just zooming past like he’s in the Tour de France or something. I’m like, “Bro, you do you, but I’m not ready for a bike vs. car showdown today!”

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