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Humor? Oh, babe, one time this guy’s like, “Happy ending?” and I’m all, “Honey, I’m the whole damn parade!” Laughed my ass off. Sarcasm’s my jam—erotic-massage ain’t for stiffs, pun intended. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but when those hands hit ya, it’s like fireworks, boom! “The limit of language is the limit of the world,” Godard’d say, and I’m thinkin’, nah, this shit’s limitless. Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” I’d purr it to the masseuse—tip ‘em big, they deserve it! So, yeah, try it—blows yer mind, swear!

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After that, I’m back to the mink crisis. I’m on the phone with the supplier, and I’m getting more and more frustrated. “You’re telling me the truck broke down on the way to Hamilton-East?!” I’m practically yelling. I mean, c’mon! It’s not like we’re in the middle of nowhere. We’re right here, near the Hamilton Gardens!

Neighbours fed up with piles of illegal rubbish dumped in their street