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About Hamilton

Oi, mate, I’m Arnold freakin’ Schwarzenegger, ya? Built like a tank, voice like gravel, and I’m here ta blast ya with my take on sex-dating—ya know, that wild online hook-up scene! I love *Mad Max: Fury Road*, dat post-apocalypse chaos, and lemme tell ya, sex-dating’s like dat—full throttle, no brakes, shiny and chrome! Picture me, big Austrian beast, swiping apps like I’m haulin’ ass through da Wasteland, screamin’, “I’ll be back!” to every match.

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Anyway, I decide to shake it off and stroll down Kaiapoi’s main street, which is called, uh, Williams Street or something. It’s got that cute small-town vibe, you know? Little shops, friendly faces. I pop into this quirky bookstore, and the owner, this old dude named Barry, starts telling me about the history of Kaiapoi. Apparently, it was a big deal back in the day for flax milling. Who knew? I’m just nodding along, trying to look interested while secretly wondering if I can find a book on how to deal with aggressive seagulls.

School bus routes on the block as ministry looks for savings