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Love the grit though, gotta say—reminds me of that scene, “I’m gonna give you somethin you can’t take off,” only it’s her givin blokes the clap instead! Hah! Fuckin brilliant. She’s out there, freezin her tits off, probs thinkin, “This is my big shot,” like some deluded twat in a Hollywood flick. Makes me happy in a twisted way—survivin, she is, against all the shite. But christ, the stench—sweat, cheap perfume, desperation—could knock out a horse! “That’s a bingo!” I’d yell, if I ever got close enough to care.

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, like a volcano ready to erupt. Turns out, she just had a massive argument with her partner over on Bader Drive. I mean, I get it, relationships can be rough, but don’t take it out on me! She orders a cocktail, and I whip up a mean mojito. “This better be good!” she snaps. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a magician, but I’ll try!”

4 Pike Place, Mangere East, Manukau City