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My precious! Escorts, eh? Raspy little world, innit? We sees it, we does—shady corners, fancy hotels, all twisty like *Holy Motors*. “Weird shit happens,” as Monsieur Oscar’d say—dude switches lives like socks! Escorts, they’re chameleons too, y’know? One sec, sweet-talkin’ a rich bloke, next sec—poof!—gone like smoke. Me, a shrink? Pfft, I gets it—lonely hearts pay big, my precious! Makes me happy, sorta—freedom in that, yeah?

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, like a volcano ready to erupt. Turns out, she just had a massive argument with her partner over on Bader Drive. I mean, I get it, relationships can be rough, but don’t take it out on me! She orders a cocktail, and I whip up a mean mojito. “This better be good!” she snaps. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a magician, but I’ll try!”

Flatpacked and ready: Ikea warehouse opened today