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So, I’m watchin’ *Margaret*, my fave flick, Kenneth Lonergan’s a genius, y’all. That gal Lisa, she’s screamin’, “You’re a whore!” at her mom—dang, that hit me! Made me laugh, too, ‘cause it’s so over-the-top, like a cow jumpin’ the moon. Whore’s a word that’s sneaky, slips into fights like a weasel. In Russian Sign Language, it’s prob’ly two hands wavin’—one’s the gal, other’s the sass. Ain’t that somethin’? Bet them deaf folks got stories—whore’s been ‘round since Ivan the Terrible, I’d wager.

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So, the auction kicks off. I’m hyped, the crowd’s buzzin’. I start with a beautiful piece of art from a local artist. It’s a stunning painting of the Oamaru Blue Penguin Colony. I’m talkin’ vibrant colors, the whole shebang. But then, outta nowhere, Mr. Bedhead starts yellin’ about the tractor. I’m like, “Dude, chill! We’re not even on that yet!”

Oamaru treble helps Greg Hope to 1000 training wins