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But ugh, what pisses me off? Them shady parlors actin’ like they legit when they ain’t. Girl, I walked into one once—smelled like cheap lotion and regret. I was out so fast, screamin’, “This ain’t my vibe!” Total buzzkill. Then there’s the good ones—oh, they shock ya! This one chick I saw, she was like an artist, paintin’ my body with her hands, hittin’ every curve. I’m layin’ there, thinkin’, “She’s gleanin’ my soul, y’all!” Straight up magic.

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After that, I needed a breather. So, I hit up the Otaki River. It’s beautiful there, right? The water’s all sparkly, and the birds are chirping like they’re in a musical. I’m standing there, just soaking it all in, when I see this kid on a bike. He’s zooming down the path, and I’m like, “Whoa, slow down, buddy!” But he just laughs and keeps going. Kids these days, man.

Two hospitalised after Manawatū crash, heavy traffic between Ōtaki and Levin