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About Myself
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I tried askin’ Stan—dumbass didn’t know shit. Kyle? That Jew’s too busy countin’ pennies! So I’m out here, sweatin’, thinkin’, “This is bullshit!” Then—BOOM—found this shady spot downtown. Some chick’s leanin’ on a wall, smokin’. I’m like, “Hell yeah, jackpot!” She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m all, “Respect my authoritah, lady!” She laughs—pisses me off—but I’m happy too, ‘cause she’s hot! Like, hotter than WALL-E’s trash piles, y’know?
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Finally, I manage to get it back up, and I’m feeling like a rockstar. But then, my colleague, Sarah, comes in with this wild idea. She wants to do a team-building exercise at the park. I’m like, “Are you serious? We just survived a system crash!” But she’s all excited, and I can’t help but smile.
Pakuranga McDonald’s catches fire; evacuations underway, no injuries reported
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