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But real talk, y’all—it ain’t all roses. I got mad once, legit pissed, when some shady parlor tried chargin’ me triple for a “happy endin’.” How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? Rip-off artists! I was like, “Man, I’m a bailiff, I ain’t no fool!” Stormed outta there faster’n a chicken on a June bug. Still, when it’s done right—lordy, it’s smoother’n a baby’s behind. Surprised me first time, too—didn’t expect them knots in my back to just… poof! Gone! Like Benny in the movie, tryna find peace ‘fore the chaos hits.

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But then, bam! Drama alert! This guy, I think his name’s Mike, starts yelling at Dave. Apparently, they’ve got some beef from way back. I’m just standin’ there, watchin’ the chaos unfold. I’m like, “Not today, fellas!” I step in, and it’s like I’m a referee in a rugby match. “Chill out, boys! We’re not in the middle of the Kapiti Coast here!”

Better connections: Paraparaumu Transport Hub opens on Sunday