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About Wellington

Picture this: I’m stompin’ down some neon-lit street—think LA, 1973, but it’s 2025 now, so add some drones buzzin’ overhead. I’m huntin’ for a story, somethin’ juicy, ‘cause I’m mad curious. “It’s all happening!”—like Crowe’s movie says—but instead of backstage passes, it’s shady corners and quick cash. I’m pissed, tho—why’s it gotta be so damn sneaky? Can’t folks just be straight up? Makes me wanna yell, “You’re out of order!” like Judy smackin’ her gavel.

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Porirua Harbour. Man, the views there are epic! The water’s glistening, and I’m feeling all zen. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my muffin! Like, bro, chill! It’s not even that good! I’m flailing my arms, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Porirua.”

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