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About Christchurch

Alright, listen up, fam—imagine me, Morgan Freeman, deep voice rollin’ thru your soul, talkin’ ‘bout a prostitute, yeah, that’s right. Picture this—world’s a stage, like in *Synecdoche, New York*, Charlie Kaufman’s wild ride, where every gal’s playin’ a part, even her. She’s out there, heels clickin’ on pavement, life a messy script, no rehearsals. “The end is built into the beginning,” I hear Kaufman whisperin’ in my head, and damn, ain’t that her truth? She’s hustlin’, survivin’, caught in loops—like Caden Cotard buildin’ his freaky city.

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So, I’m walkin’ back down Victoria Ave, and I see this street performer. He’s playin’ the ukulele and singing some catchy tune. I’m like, “Dude, you’re killin’ it!” I toss him a couple of coins, and he gives me a shout-out. Felt like a rockstar for a sec.

Deceased estate sold for $4m; seven charities benefit