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But, ugh, some creeps out there—total buzzkill—think it’s all shady. Makes me so mad! I’m, like, “Ew, get a life, it’s luxe!” One time, I got this massage in Paris—legit cried ‘cause it was so fab. The candles, the vibes, the hands—chef’s kiss! Probs misspelled that, lol, whoopsie. Oh, and fun fact—did ya know some pros use, like, hot stones for that extra zing? I was shooketh! Thought in my head, “Kim, you’re living your best life.”

Why is the Richmond road branch so important and popular?

Mr. Thompson was there, sippin’ his flat white, lookin’ all chill. I’m like, “Dude, I’m so sorry!” He just chuckled and said, “You’re lucky I like my coffee hot.” Classic Thompson. We got to talkin’ about his home insurance, and he started ramblin’ about his cat, Whiskers. Apparently, Whiskers has a knack for knockin’ over his prized garden gnomes. I mean, who knew cats could be such little devils?

Legendary Hawthorn coach Alastair Clarkson returns for 100-year celebration against Richmond