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Been diggin’ into this—turns out, ancient China had this gig goin’. Taoist cats called it “fangzhongshu”—fancy term for sexy rubdowns. Kept the chi flowin’, if ya catch my drift. Blew my mind—imagine some monk perfectin’ *that* in 200 BC! Meanwhile, I’m over here, pissed—modern spas charge 200 bucks for 30 mins. Highway robbery, bro! Could build a Tesla coil cheaper.
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But then, as he’s leaving, he trips on the sidewalk outside. I’m dying inside. Like, c’mon! You just got the shoes! But he gets up, laughs it off, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe today’s not so bad.”
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