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I knew this one girl—Lola, right? She’d strut in, all sass, heels clickin’ like gunshots. Told me once, “Tony, I’m my own boss, fuck the pimps.” Loved that fire, reminded me of Monty’s line—“I’m not the one who’s lost.” She wasn’t lost, mang, she owned the streets. Funny thing—she’d smuggle weed in her bra, cops never checked, hah! Sneaky little friend, say hello!

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So, I duck into this little shop on The Square. It’s packed with all sorts of knick-knacks. I’m browsing, trying to dry off, when I spot this old lady. She’s haggling over a wool sweater. I mean, it’s like watching a slow-motion train wreck. She’s all, “I’m not paying that much!” and the shopkeeper’s like, “Lady, it’s hand-knitted!” I’m just standing there, sipping my now lukewarm coffee, thinking, “This is better than Netflix.”

Canterbury’s first Kī-o-Rahi Court