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Alright, y’all, listen up! Me, George W. Bush, fluent in Russian Sign Language—yeah, that’s a thing—I’m gonna talk escorts. Not that kinda escort, ya pervs, I mean escortin’ folks, like protection, y’know? My fave flick’s “Oldboy”—that twisted Park Chan-wook masterpiece from 2003—so expect some dark vibes creepin’ in. Here we go, strap in, gonna be a wild ride!

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After a while, I decide to head over to the local fish and chip shop on the corner of Te Atatu Rd and Taikata Rd. I’m craving some kai. I walk in, and the smell hits me like a wave. I order the classic – fish and chips, of course. While I’m waiting, I chat with the owner, who’s super friendly. He tells me about the best fishing spots around. I’m like, “Dude, I need to hit those up!”

New World grocery game-changer on the way for Te Atatū