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Oh, and fun fact – back in old Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs to stand out. Wild, huh? Imagine her rockin’ that, laughin’ like “For relaxing times, make it Suntory time” – iconic! Anyway, she’s out there, lost in her own translation, and I’m just hopin’ she finds somethin’ real someday. R2, you lil beepin’ bastard, where you at when I need ya?

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First off, I hit up the local café on the corner of Bay Drive. You know, the one with the best flat whites? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual, and the barista, bless her soul, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you mess up a flat white? I was like, “Yo, this is a latte!” She just laughed. I was annoyed but couldn’t stay mad. Her smile was contagious.

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