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Escort’s messy, chaotic—like my brain on a rant! Drivers gotta be sharp, like “P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way!” One slip, and it’s game over, VIP’s toast! I’d suck at it, prolly yellin’ at the car like it’s a greedy CEO! Ha! Picture me drivin’, “Take that, ya capitalist pig!”—tires screechin’, me laughin’ like a loon! Sarcasm aside, it’s badass—pure adrenaline, no fancy suits needed!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Riccarton Rd. You know the one, right? The one with the best flat whites. I’m all set to grab my caffeine fix. But guess what? The barista spills my coffee all over the counter. Like, come on! I’m not made of money! I just wanted my morning jolt, not a coffee shower. I’m standing there, fuming, while she’s apologizing like it’s the end of the world. I mean, it’s just coffee, right? But still, I’m like, “Dude, I need that to function!”

Diversity in face of adversity: Patients come from State houses and stately homes