Avery Waikanae Erotic Massage ❤️❤️

About Christchurch

Here’s a kicker—didja know in Japan, they got this thing, “nuru massage”? Slippery seaweed gel, bodies slidin’ everywhere—sounds like a freakin’ slip-n-slide porno! I’m imaginin’ it now, too much, too much, I’d fall off the table, break my neck, sue somebody! But people love it, swear it’s “transcendent.” Me? I’d be screamin’, “Where’s the towel, I’m done!”

Welcome to Lush Massage

But wait, it gets better. I’m on the bus, and this dude next to me starts talking about his pet iguana. Like, who even has an iguana? I’m trying to focus on my work, but he’s going on and on about how it eats crickets. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a biochemist, not a reptile vet.” But whatever, I nod and smile.

Red toxic algae warning for Waikanae River at Jim Cooke Park