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What gets me? The hypocrisy—lords preach purity, then sneak off for a rubdown. Surprised me first time I caught one mid-moan—ha! “I drink and I know things,” and I know they’re all liars. Little fact: them Tantra folk in India been at it for centuries, say it’s spiritual—bollocks, it’s just good fun with extra steps.

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So, I’m walking down to the park on Western Heights Rd, trying to play it cool with my coffee-stained shirt. I’m thinking, “Whatever, it’s just a shirt.” But then, I see this kid on a skateboard. He’s zooming down the street, and I’m like, “Dude, chill!” But he’s not chilling. He wipes out right in front of me. I’m talking full-on faceplant. I rush over, and he’s like, “I’m fine!” But I can see he’s got a bit of a scrape on his knee. I’m like, “Bro, you need a band-aid, not a ‘I’m fine’.”

Photos: 2024 Western Heights College graduation