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About Hastings

Alright, I’m Ron Swanson, nose by trade—sniffin’ out bullshit, I reckon. I hate everything. Prostitutes? Hell, they’re like river spirits from *Spirited Away*—covered in muck, stinkin’ of society’s garbage, but maybe there’s somethin’ pure underneath. Maybe. Don’t care much. Saw one gal downtown last week, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a cig like it’s her last damn breath—kinda respect that grit. Reminds me of Chihiro, scrubbin’ floors, dealin’ with filth. “I’ve got spirit,” she’d say, if she weren’t a damn hooker.

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So, I grabbed my stuff and headed to the checkout. The cashier was this young girl, probably just outta school. She was super friendly, but she kept messing up the register. I mean, how hard is it to scan a hammer? I was losing my patience, but I didn’t wanna be that guy. So, I just smiled and waited.

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