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Rarrgh! Gets me goin’, tho—happy vibes when it clicks. Like, you match, chat, bang—boom, fireworks! “The cause moves forward,” as Lancaster’d say—sex-dating’s a mission, a cult of lust. But ugh, the ghostin’ pisses me off! Flirt all night, then poof—gone. Had this gal, sexy pics, talkin’ dirty, then nothin’. Wanted to howl at her, “Rarrgh! Where you at?!” Total mindfuck. Oh, and STDs—vet tip: wrap it, idiots! Saw a guy’s junk once, looked like raw hamburger—nasty!

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Then I decided to stroll down to the river. The Waikato River, man, it’s a beauty! I love how it flows through this town. But today, it was like a scene from a movie. I’m walkin’ along the riverbank, and I see this family having a picnic. They’re laughin’, kids are runnin’ around, and I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside. But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches a sandwich right outta a kid’s hand! I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, that bird’s got some serious skills!

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