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Alright, mate, lemme spill the tea on escorts, yeah? Dr. Evil style – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!” Here’s the deal, escorts ain’t just arm candy, nah, they’re pros at playin’ the game. Watched *The Royal Tenenbaums* last night – again – and I’m thinkin’, escorts got that Margot vibe, y’know? Mysterious, classy, but with a wild streak. “I’m adopted, did you know that?” – nah, escorts ain’t tellin’ you their real story, mate, it’s all smoke and mirrors.

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So, I walk in, and there’s this huge argument over who ate the last donut. Seriously? We’re adults here! I mean, it’s just a donut, but it’s like the world’s biggest crisis. I’m trying to mediate, but they’re all shouting. I’m like, “Guys, chill! It’s not the end of the world!” But nope, they’re too far gone.

Man brutally attacked with samurai sword in Poland