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Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, sex-dating, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ minefield, like in *The Hurt Locker*. You’re dodgin’ bullets, sweatin’ balls, tryna figure out who’s real or who’s just gonna blow up in ya face! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ – what’s the deal with these apps, huh? Swipe this, swipe that, like I’m pickin’ prosciutto at the deli. Back in the day, you’d meet a broad at the Bada Bing, buy her a drink, boom, done. Now? It’s all “profile pics” and “DMs” – what the hell’s a DM? Direct whackin’?
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After that, I decided to walk it off. I headed towards the Brzeg Castle. You know, the one that looks like it’s straight outta a fairy tale? I was just admiring the architecture when I tripped over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I fell, and my coffee went flying. I was like, “Noooo!” But then I saw this cute dog running over to me. It was a golden retriever, and it just licked my face. Instant mood booster!
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