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About Krakow

Me, I’d be rubbish at givin’ it – shaky hands, “Sharon, help!” – but watchin’ it? Fuckin’ ace. Pro tip – them scented oils? Patchouli’s the one, smells like a hippy’s wet dream. An’ don’t skimp, splash it on! Makes it slippery an’ mental – “The jungle hums,” like Boonmee’d say. Pure chaos, pure bliss, mate – that’s sexual-massage for ya!

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After that chaos, I’m feeling a bit frazzled. I decide to take a breather at the park by ul. Piastowska. It’s a nice spot, you know? Trees, benches, and a fountain that’s always kinda broken. I sit down, take a deep breath, and just chill for a sec. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m thinking, “Dude, save it for home!” But then, the guy pulls out a ring and proposes! I’m like, “Wait, what?!” Talk about a plot twist! The girl’s crying, and I’m just there, trying not to eavesdrop but can’t help it.

From Warsaw to the Alps: New night train to cross three countries