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About Szczecin

Been at it for years—seen shit you wouldn’t beleive. Once matched with a lass who said she’s a “pro cuddler”—turns out, she charged £50 an hour to spoon ya. Laughed my arse off, but I was tempted, swear down. “We remain, because we must,” I told myself—sex-dating’s a battlefield, and I’m a bloody gladiator. Angry? Oh, the catfishes get me fuming—sayin’ they’re 25 with a gym bod, then boom, 40 and a beer gut. Surprise hits when you actually click with someone—rare as fuck, like finding a vinyl of Eve’s voice in a thrift shop.

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So, I’m back to square one, coffee-less and annoyed. I decide to take a walk by the river, the Warta. It’s peaceful there, and I can finally breathe. The trees are whispering, and I’m feelin’ a bit better. I sit on a bench, just chillin’, when I spot this family having a picnic. They’ve got all this food laid out, and I’m like, “Man, I could go for some of that.”

West London Varsity: Get to know Filip Chalupniczak