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My fave part? When they hit that spot—y’know, lower back, and I’m like, “Oh, damn, I’m alive!” Surprised me first time. Thought I’d levitate. Prolly looked dumb, mouth open, droolin’ a lil’. Don’t judge me, aight? It’s intimate but chill, like you’re in on a joke nobody else gets. Oh, and the scented oils? Lavender’s my jam—smells like peace, not like my boy’s sweaty gym socks.

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So, I’m walking down ul. Kościuszki, trying to shake off the coffee disaster. I’m thinking about hitting the park, maybe chill by the lake. But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s a car that just backed into a bike! Like, seriously? Who even does that? The biker’s yelling, the driver’s freaking out, and I’m just standing there like, “What is happening?”

Polska Piłka: The Ekstraliga medal battle is underway