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Funny bit—mate of mine got one, slipped off the table, buck-naked, crashed into a lamp. Laughed my ass off picturin it. Me? I stayed put, but damn, nearly proposed to her hands. Sarcasm aside, it’s bloody brilliant—tension’s gone, feelin like a king. Exaggeratin? Maybe. But when she whispered, “Relax, cowboy,” I was done for—pure Brokeback magic. “Tonight’s the night,” I reckon, monotone as ever, but inside? Fuckin fireworks. Try it, ya won’t regret it—unless ya fall, then ya might.

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First off, I hit up my fav café on ul. Sienkiewicza. They got the best coffee, like, ever. I order my usual – a double shot of espresso. I need that kick, ya know? But the barista, bless her heart, spills half of it. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I mean, c’mon, it’s not rocket science. I’m already cranky, and now I’m just a caffeine-deprived monster.

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