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Now, here’s the rum-soaked truth – erotic-massage ain’t cheap! Ye fork over 50, 100 quid, dependin’ on the port. Made me angry, that – why’s a quick thrill cost me ship’s rations? But then, I saw the profit – them parlors rakin’ it in! Little-known fact, arr: back in ol’ Bangkok, they say these massages started with monks – holy hands turnin’ unholy, ha! Surprised me, that did – got me gigglin’ like a drunk parrot.

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I’m laughing, but also kinda mad. Those flowers were pretty! I mean, come on, it’s Luzino! We gotta keep it pretty! Anyway, I help the poor vendor pick up the mess. He’s super grateful, and I’m like, “Dude, it’s all good. Just don’t let it happen again!”

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