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Here’s the kicker—did ya know some pros use hot stones? Fuckin’ wild, right? Puts ‘em on ya back, heats ya up, then bam—hands all over. Surprised the shit outta me first time—thought they was cookin’ me! But nah, it’s like heaven, man—gets the blood pumpin’, cock ready to roll. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s the business—this sexual-massage game. Ain’t just for pussies neither—real men get in on it. Tarantino’d prob’ly dig it—bloody, messy, intense as fuck!

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So, I rush over to the lumberyard. It’s on the outskirts, near the river. I’m speed-walkin’, dodgin’ people like I’m in some kinda obstacle course. I get there, and the guy at the yard is like, “Sorry, mate, we’re out.” I’m like, “Out? You gotta be kiddin’ me!” I could feel my blood boilin’.

Poland records hottest ever February temperatures