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Favorite part? When it works—two randos meet, sparks fly, they’re fuckin’ like rabbits. “You’re an animal!”—that’s what I’d yell, like in the movie. But damn, the flops? Brutal. Dude waits hours, gets stood up—Llewyn vibes again, “Where’s my damn cat?”—except it’s “Where’s my damn date?” Sex-datin’s a gamble, bro—half the time you’re winnin’, half you’re cryin’.

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I woke up late, of course. Alarm? What alarm? I jumped outta bed, threw on my lucky shirt (the one with the coffee stain, yeah, classy), and bolted out the door. I live on ul. Główna, right near that little bakery. You know, the one that smells like heaven? I grabbed a croissant on the way. Best decision ever.