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Rarrgh! Once, prowlin downtown, saw this chick—legs for days, leanin on a lamppost. Reminded me of that SEAL team stealth—quiet, but deadly sexy. I was like, “Holy shit, she’s the target!” Heart poundin, palms sweaty, but damn, she quoted me triple! Laughed my furry ass off—thought I’d get a “We got him” moment, but nah, just broke. Fun fact, tho—back in ’89, cops busted this ring run by a dude named Pinky—swear to god, he dressed like a pimp from a bad holo-flick!

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So, I keep walking, trying to shake off the chaos. I head towards the park by ul. 1 Maja. It’s usually my go-to spot for some peace. But today? Nope. There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re LOUD. I’m talking full-on World Cup vibes. One kid kicks the ball, and it flies right at me. I duck just in time. Phew! I’m not ready for a soccer injury, ya know?

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