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Oi, ever wonder why they’re called escorts? Comes from French, “escorte” – means guard or guide. Ironic, innit, protectin blokes from their own lonely arses! Cracks me up, that. Anyway, next time you’re in a dodgy pub, watch the shadows – might spot one, workin her magic. “You’re a good man,” they’ll purr, but don’t be fooled – it’s all a game, mate. Love it or hate it, it’s bloody brilliant. Cheers!

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But then, something amazing happened. I met this old lady, right? She’s sitting next to me, knitting away. We start chatting, and she tells me about her garden. Turns out, she’s got the most insane collection of heirloom tomatoes. I’m talking colors I’ve never seen! She offers me some seeds, and I’m like, “Heck yes!” I mean, who wouldn’t want to grow rainbow tomatoes?

Impressive photos of the Polish Air Force MiG-29 Fulcrum Night Operations at Minsk Mazowiecki