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Lemme spin ye a yarn—Ford Escort, born ‘68, a scrappy deckhand o’ the roads. Wee engine, 1.1 liters, sputterin’ like a drunk pirate! But she sailed, arrgh, she sailed! Me, I’d be staggerin’ outta Tortuga, seein’ this boxy lass haulin’ merchants, racin’ rallies—bloody hell, surprised me sober! Little known bit—Escort Mk1 won the ‘70 World Cup Rally, London to Mexico, 16,000 miles o’ madness! Beat them posh Porsches, ha! “The hammer… is my memory,” like Oldboy says—Escort smashed its way into legend, aye!
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Then, outta nowhere, this lady starts yellin’. I look over, and she’s flailing her arms like she’s trying to take off. Turns out, her dog, a little furball named Max, decided to take a swim without permission. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a lake, not a doggy spa!” But I jump in anyway. Max is paddlin’ like a champ, but he’s also kinda panicking. I’m thinkin’, “If I don’t save this dog, I’m gonna be the lifeguard who lost a dog. Not cool.”
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