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I’m scrollin’, seein’ these bios—“DTF, no drama.” Bullshit! Always drama, motherfucker! One time, this guy—swear he’s a 10—texts me, “You up?” I’m like, “Hell yeah!” Next thing, he’s cryin’ bout his ex mid-hookup! I’m sittin’ there, dick out, thinkin’, “What is this, a therapy sesh?!” Made me mad as fuck—don’t waste my time, asshole! “You’re not a victim here!”—straight outta *Margaret*, Lisa yellin’ at her mom vibes. Sex-dating ain’t for the weak, man!

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The afternoon drags on. I’m knee-deep in documents, and my brain’s fried. I look out the window, and there’s this street performer on ul. Słowiańska. He’s juggling flaming torches! I’m like, “What the heck? Is this a circus or what?” I can’t help but laugh.