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But lemme tell ya what pisses me off—those shady parlors givin’ it a bad name. “Happy ending” my ass—cheapens the whole damn thing! A real sexual-massage ain’t about that quick finish; it’s slow-burn ecstasy, buildin’ up till you’re screamin’—not from pain, mind ya, but bliss. Like in *The Act of Killing*—those gangsters braggin’ bout murder, struttin’ around—I’d say, “I’ve killed a man with my bare hands,” but swap killin’ for kneadin’, and that’s the vibe. Mastery, precision, a lil’ menace in the touch.

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Then, I head over to the church. You know, my workplace. It’s this beautiful old building, all stone and history. But today? Today, the roof is leaking! Like, seriously? I’m a clergyman, not a roofer! I’m up there with buckets, trying to catch the drips. And of course, it starts pouring outside. Just my luck, right?

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