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But real talk, it ain’t all roses. Some dodgy geezer tried chargin’ me 50 quid for a “happy endin’,” and I’m like, “Bruv, I ain’t here for dat!” Pissed me right off—felt like Frank in da movie, hidin’ his true self. “I’m not like you,” he says—same vibe, I ain’t no perv, just want me back sorted! Still, when it’s good, it’s bangin’. Dis one time, I swear, her hands was like magic—had me floatin’, happier than a pig in shit. Surprised me, innit—didn’t expect to feel so chill.

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After that, I decided to grab some food. I hit up this little joint on ul. Żwirki i Wigury. Best pierogi ever! I ordered a plate, and while I was waiting, I overheard this couple arguing. Like, come on, guys! Not in public! But then, they started laughing, and I was like, “What just happened?” Love is weird, man.

“The most important thing is competence, not gender.”