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About Lublin

I’m strollin, boots clickin, thinkin—where’s the talent at? Then bam—this bird struts up, all sass, skirt shorter than a dwarf’s temper. “You lost, luv?” she goes, smirkin like she knows I’m a sucker for trouble. “Ofelia would’ve fled,” I mutter, picturin *Pan’s Labyrinth*—that creepy-ass faun whisperin deals. But me? I’m in, mate—glorious purpose an’ all. She’s quotin prices like it’s a bloody auction—50 quid for this, 80 for that. I’m like, “Lass, I’m a god, not a bank!” Made me ragey, but also—damn, she’s bold, gotta respect the hustle.

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After that, I head over to ul. 1 Maja. Traffic was a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this old dude in a beat-up car. He’s going 20 in a 50 zone. I’m losing my mind. I’m like, “C’mon, man! We’re not in a funeral procession!” Finally, I zoom past him, and I swear he gave me the dirtiest look. Whatever, dude.

Israel: Promised land for criminals