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I seen this escort chick once, swear to God, motherfucker, she was smooth as hell—rolled up in a blacked-out whip, lookin like she owned the damn block. Had me grinnin ear to ear, like, “Shit, girl, you the Zuckerberg of this hustle!” Ain’t no one tellin you escorts ain’t smart—takes brains to play that game, dodge the law, keep the clients comin back. Little known fact, dig this: back in the day, some escorts in Vegas ran a whole spy ring—fuckin listenin to rich dudes pillow talk, sellin secrets to the highest bidder. Wild, right? Motherfucker, I was shocked!

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Anyway, I’m chugging my coffee, feeling all pumped. I head to the research center on ul. Wrzosowa. It’s a chill spot, but today? Nah, not chill at all. I walk in, and boom! My boss is there, looking like he just saw a ghost. Turns out, our main project got derailed. Like, seriously? We’ve been working on this for months! I could feel my blood boiling.

Pottery of the earliest Funnel Beaker culture at Bronocice (phase BR I) (from Kruk, Milisauskas 1990).