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Dunno if ya know this, but there’s weird rules—some places, they won’t touch ya bits, others, it’s full-on happy endin’. Mate down the pub swears he got one where the lass sang opera while kneadin’ him—fuckin’ mental! Laughed me arse off, but now I’m jealous—where’s MY singin’ masseuse? Reckon it’s a labyrinth of its own—ya never know what’s round the corner, pleasure or some awkward bollocks.

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PORNPROS Busty blonde Kylie Page sexual massage and fuck (Blondie Anderson, Bonnie Kinz).

After that little drama, I head to the park. Blonie has this cool park, right? It’s got trees, obviously, but also a pond. I’m thinking, “This is my kinda place.” I sit on a bench, just chillin’, when a bunch of kids run by, screaming and laughing. They’re playing tag or something. I can’t help but smile. Kids have that energy, ya know?

Figure 1: Early medieval hillfort in Błonie, Mazowieckie Voivodeship....