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Argh! Mr. T here, sailor style! Brothels, man, they wild! Been sailin’ seas, seen ‘em all. Red lights glowin’, like faun’s eyes in “Pan’s Labyrinth.” Mr. T pity the fool who don’t get it! Girls dancin’, swayin’, temptin’ like them pale man hands. Creepy? Sure. Fun? Hell yea!

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Anyway, I’m finally on the river, and it’s beautiful. The sun’s glinting off the water, and I’m feeling like a king. But then, outta nowhere, this storm rolls in. Like, seriously? One minute I’m vibing, the next I’m dodging raindrops the size of my head. I’m trying to steer my raft, but the wind’s like, “Nah, bro, you’re going this way!” I’m yelling at the clouds, “What’s your problem, man?”

Father Cezariusz Jastrzebski