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Alright, pal, strap in—sexual-massage time! I’m Dr. House, sarcastic bastard, and everybody lies. So, sexual-massage—oily hands, dim lights, weird vibes. It’s like “Fish Tank,” gritty, raw, real messy. Mia’s dance in that flick? Pure tension, awkward sexiness—same deal here. Some chick’s rubbin’ you down, and you’re thinkin’, “Is this allowed?” Ha! Laws? Gray as hell—depends where ya are. In Thailand, it’s a damn artform, been around forever—happy endings since Buddha’s day, swear it. Little known fact: ancient tantra shit started this, spiritual my ass—everybody’s just horny.

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But then, as I was leaving, I bumped into an old friend from high school. We hadn’t seen each other in ages! We ended up chatting for like an hour. Turns out, he’s a chef now. He invited me to his restaurant. I’m like, “Dude, I’m in!”

Wizz Air’s Special International Women’s Day Flight from London to Lublin, Operated by an All-Female Crew, Highlights the Airline’s Commitment to Gender Equality and Inclusion