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Sometimes I’m extra, I know, but I’d exaggerate and say it’s, like, better than a Birkin bag drop. LOL, imagine Kanye getting one—he’d be so salty I didn’t tell him sooner! Oh, and the humor? Some dude prolly thinks it’s all happy endings—nah, bro, it’s about tension release, not your dumb fantasy. Sarcasm on fleek: “Oh, sure, Chad, it’s porn live.” Eye roll.

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I’m thinking, “Girl, it’s not the end of the world!” But I can’t say that. So, I’m like, “Let’s find something even better!” We scour the racks. I’m pulling stuff left and right. I find this killer jacket. She’s not into it. Ugh, why?