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Little fact for ya—back in the day, folks used newspaper ads for hookups! Ain’t that a trip? Now it’s all DMs and “u up?” texts. I’m over here laughin’—half these dates feel like “Caché” tapes droppin’ outta nowhere! “Someone’s always watchin’,” I mutter, peekin’ at my phone. This one time, chile, I matched with a dude—swore he was a prince! Turned out he lived in his mama’s basement! I hollered, “You ain’t no royalty, fool!”

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Then, I head to the park by ul. Słowiańska. It’s a nice spot, but today? It’s packed! Kids running around, dogs barking, and I’m just trying to find a bench. Finally, I spot one, but it’s taken by this couple making out like they’re in a rom-com. Ugh, get a room! I sit on the grass instead.

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