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But here’s the kicker—sarcasm time. Escortin’ sounds glam, right? Pfft, half the time it’s babysittin’ grown-ass adults. “Don’t trip, sir,” or “Quit whinin’, ma’am.” Like, c’mon, I’d rather chop logs than play nanny. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it’s funny ‘cause it’s true. *Timbuktu* nails it—“The cattle wander free.” Escorts don’t—they’re stuck herdin’ humans!

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First off, I hit up ul. Wrocławska for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that little café, Kawa i Czekolada. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. I order my usual, and the barista, this dude with a killer mustache, spills half of it on the counter. I’m like, “Bro, I need that caffeine!” But he just laughs it off. I mean, who spills coffee at 8 AM?

Fig. 2: Location of housing estates or residential districts mentioned...