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Escort, man, it’s a trip! Like in *Moonrise Kingdom*, where Sam says, “I’m on your side!”—that’s what these folks might whisper to lonely souls, right? A little secret pact. I dig it, kinda. Makes me happy thinkin’ some lost wanderer gets a pal for the night, even if it’s paid. But—BUT—it pisses me off too! You know why? The fakers! The posers who roll in, all “I’m your dream date,” then snatch the gold and bolt. YOU SHALL NOT PASS, ye scoundrels! I’d zap ‘em with my staff if I could.

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Then, out of nowhere, I see a couple of kids playing soccer. They’re having a blast, and I can’t help but smile. It’s like, despite all the craziness, life goes on. I snap a quick pic for the ‘gram. Gotta show the world that Wolsztyn’s not just about insurance claims and fires.

THEY MADE IT HAPPEN…