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So, I’m hoppin along, mindin my biz, thinkin – how’s this even work? Ya don’t just yell, “Hey, hooker!” Nah, that’s dumb. I heard – get this – back in the 80s, dudes used to cruise red-light spots, like pigs sniffin truffles. Little known fact: some cities had “prostitute maps” – legit guides! Sold under counters, hush-hush. Wild, huh? Makes me mad tho – folks judgin em, like they’re trash. “Society tosses em out,” like Varda said bout potatoes. Misshapen, but still good, ya know?

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First off, I hit up the local café on Calle Luis Muñoz Marín. You know, the one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual, and the barista, this dude named Carlos, was like, “You want extra sugar?” I was like, “Nah, I’m sweet enough.” He laughed, but I was serious. I mean, who needs more sugar when you’re already living in paradise, right?

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