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Personal quirk? I’d totes use it myself—don’t judge! I’m single, fabulous, and Fran don’t wait for no man! “You’re incapable of being alone,” Fassbender’s character’d say—damn right, I’d reply! *HahahaHA!*—I’d exaggerate, sayin’ I’d hire ten gals just to spite my ex! Humor’s my jam—imagine the tagline: “Find a pro, ditch the woe!” Sarcasm? “Oh, sure, let’s all knit instead,” I’d scoff!

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But the Wi-Fi is spotty. I’m like, “C’mon, Cabo Rojo! Get it together!” I’m tryin’ to work, but I keep gettin’ distracted by the locals. They’re so friendly, always sayin’ hi. I love it! But also, I’m like, “Guys, I’m on a deadline!”

Mountain bikers say Cabo Rojo development blocks access to cycling areas